Two Sides, One Side, Three, or More?

We like to think there are two sides to every issue. Left and right. For or against. This side or that side. Maybe, even an independent third side. But life is rarely that neat.

I was listening to the Sean Ryan podcast driving home from teaching a class for police officers in Illinois. The guest talked about how the truth is found somewhere between left-wing and right-wing media. He had a website where he aimed to be independent, “Just the News, No Bull.” At first it sounded refreshing, but the more they spoke, the more I realized that thinking in terms of “two sides”, or even, “an independent side”, is part of our problem.

Two political parties are arbitrary. Other countries have many more. We could too. But more importantly, many, if not most, issues have more than two sides. When you divide everything into left and right, you limit your vision. You stop thinking about other possibilities. You stop asking deeper questions.

When Logic Collides with Labels

In college, my favorite professor often pointed out something that stuck with me. At that time, one political party opposed abortion but supported the death penalty. The other supported abortion but opposed the death penalty. The conflict was constantly in the news. Few seemed to recognize that both positions claimed moral consistency, yet both were logically inconsistent.

That realization hit me hard. I realized my beliefs didn’t line up neatly with either camp. I thought about it again recently as I considered how people debate these same topics today. It seems like few are willing to step outside their label to look at the logic, or even the humanity, of an issue.

Take the death penalty. I’ve spent a lot of time inside maximum-security prisons. Not as an inmate, but volunteering! It’s not a place you’d want to spend a day, much less a lifetime. If the point is punishment, life behind bars is punishment enough. Yet we still kill people, even knowing that some have been wrongly convicted. That’s not justice. It’s blindness.

When Right and Wrong Are Simple

There are some truths that don’t have two sides. It’s wrong to murder. It’s wrong to abuse a child. Those things are not open to debate. But other issues are complex because they have many sides—ten, twenty, a hundred.

What age should someone be able to drink, to serve in the military, to marry? Those questions don’t have clear sides. They live in the gray. But that gray isn’t weakness, it’s the reality of a world made up of different people, lives, and experiences.

Labels Divide, Humanity Connects

We love to label ourselves. Republican, Democrat, Independent. But the moment someone challenges that label, conversations turn personal. We defend our identity instead of exploring truth.

I’ve worked with veterans, police officers, social workers, therapists, and community leaders. I’ve seen every side of every issue. I’ve shared rooms with people who would never agree politically. Yet when we talk about life, family, purpose, and happiness, we always seem to find common ground.

You see, when we drop our labels, we can connect. When we talk and listen, not to win but to understand, something real happens.

The Real Challenge

Don’t label your opinions. Don’t call yourself independent as if that’s a third political team. Just look for truth. Be willing to be wrong. Be willing to learn. Remember, behind every label is a human being trying to make it through life, take care of loved ones, and find happiness.

When we sit down with someone, talk honestly, share stories, and laugh, it’s almost always a good moment. Those moments remind us that there are not just two sides, or three sides, there are many sides, and sometimes, just one.

Be willing to listen. Be willing to change your mind. And always remember that the goal isn’t to win an argument. It’s to understand, to grow, and to stay human.

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